Friday, January 17, 2014

Pregnancy, 17 Weeks

Today I am 17 weeks 1 day pregnant. I had an appointment yesterday, and the baby's heartbeat sounded good. I mentioned the frequent headaches that I've been having, but my doctor was vague in her comments about it. I'm guessing that if it is pre-eclampsia (which I had been wondering about), it must not be anything to worry about for now. I go back for another appointment in 4 weeks, at which time I will also have the well-known mid-pregnancy ultrasound.

I am a little nervous about that ultrasound, and it has nothing to do with the baby's gender, since we've decided to not find out. I am nervous about checking on the placenta. Has it moved out of the way, or do we officially call it placenta previa? If so, here comes c-section #2. I'm okay with that, I think. There are worse things than a repeat c-section.

I wish I could say this pregnancy was getting easier in the second trimester, but it's not. I have the stretching pains, the round ligament pains, the itchy stretch marks, the braxton-hicks contractions, back pain, headaches, mood swings, congestion, occasional nausea, sometimes serious depression, and the inevitable exhaustion. Oh, and let's not forget that I still get a horrible aftertaste if I eat any dairy other than yogurt or cheese. I really miss milk and ice cream. I am convinced that this baby is going to be the difficult one, seeing how he/she already is at not quite halfway through my pregnancy.

Simon has been my sunshine lately, and I am so very grateful for him. He is always excited to see me. He gives me lots of hugs and kisses, and always has to throw in a hug and a kiss for the baby as well. He is so excited for the baby. He frequently asks how many more days, or how big the baby is now. He even says nice little things to me when I am having a bad day. How does a six-year-old learn all this? My heart is bursting with pride. He has made the bad days bearable, and the good days wonderful.

I have 159 days until my due date, and after a miscarriage with pregnancy #3, I am grateful for every day I am still pregnant.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

New Year's Resolutions for 2014

Here it is, a little late. My resolutions for 2014. I am not resolving to lose weight, since I will be pregnant for half the year anyway. I am not resolving to be more spiritual, because that is an ongoing process that I can't achieve through a resolution.

1. Develop better cleaning habits.

I hate cleaning, and I am not very good at it. I am determined to find ways to make it easier on myself, and developing better cleaning habits is a major part of it.

2. Become more confident in being different.

I have come to accept that I am different. I don't want to be "crunchy". I dislike most cooking. I don't teach my children sign language. I would never subject myself to cloth diapers. I posess neither skill nor patience for gardening. I hate romantic books and movies. Lately, I have been feeling like I must be defective because of all this. Pinterest can be useful, but it also causes women to feel like we all have to be Martha Stewart. I resolve to embrace what I am instead of worrying about what I am not. I am not Martha Stewart.

3. Simplify my life.

I hate feeling rushed. I don't tolerate stress well. I feel certain that simplifying my life will help. So I resolve to get rid of stuff I don't need, say "no" without guilt, and develop a zen approach to life. I found a website I'll be using for this.

Wish me luck!